Brink of Insanity

I'm insane. I'm childish. I'm mad. I'm depressed. I'm a joy. I'm optimistic. I'm sarcastic. I'm narssistic. I'm pessimistic. I'm everything I am not and everything I am.
 
I need people to stop driving me mad. They need to just shut up. Just open their eyes. Just stop talking. Stop being such a fool. And stop thinking they're always right.
 
I don't need people to put me down. I don't need the extra attention. I don't need reminders. I don't need senseless words. I just need to be understood. To be appreciated.

That's all I want.

I hate it when people ignore me. I hate it when they get mad. I hate it more when I don't know why they're mad at me. I detest the feeling of feeling small and vulnerable. I don't like to whine and use cute words just to ask for forgiveness. I don't like being the one who always gives in. I don't want to give in when I don't think I'm in the wrong. I hate it when people try to tell me what to do. I hate it when my actions and words are being restricted.

I hate it that I have to pretend to be okay when all I wanted to do was to sulk and mope around. I hate it when I smile so easily when I'm mad. I hate it when they think everything's okay just because I stopped looking angry. I hate it when I actually care.

The people who drive me nuts are no good for me. Yet, they are those who I care about most. This is unfair. I want to drive them crazy as much as they do to me. I want them to suffer and feel what I'm feeling.

I'm not obliged to anything I don't want to do or feel. And it shall remain this way.
I just hope that they'll understand me and stop driving me crazy.
I'm insane enough. I just wanna be myself.