Dear self,

What else can I say?
Today is a rather moody day.
I should have known in the morning.
Things are not going to go right.
Talent race- I knew it was all along a scam. 
We're all guinea pigs from the start.
Who actually cares about this competition?
Yes, the prize is attractive.
The price is too much to pay.
If I didn't participate, I wouldn't feel this way now.
There'll be no disappointment, stress or anger of any sort.
I'll be spending my time doing my assignments instead.
It definitely sounds better than having to slave away and getting no end result.

People around you.
It only shows during times like this.
Who are the ones. Who are not. 
Who don't care. Who are just making use of you. 
Who are true friends. Who are treating you as friends with benefits.
It's such a simple task. 
I don't think any excuses will be valid.
It only shows this much about you.
Yet, it shows so much.
Again, if there was no talent race to begin with, this would not have been realized.
Should I be thankful or should I not?

Should I explain how I feel to you or should I not waste my breath on this?
Will you understand my feelings?

It's time to wake up and accept reality.
Because not all things will go the way you've planned,
not everyone will respect you,
not everyone deserves your attention,
not everyone appreciates the things you do.
Perhaps it's time to stop being such a kind person.
Perhaps, I can afford to be a little selfish sometimes.

-Someone stupid who skipped lunch for something others do not even bother